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How to Give Up Masturbation
Adapted from Islam Online

Please see the Islamic Rulings section to find what scholars have said regarding masturbation being something that should indeed be avoided.

The majority of Muslim scholars consider masturbation Haram. Imam Malik bases his judgement on the verse: “Those who guard their sexual organs except with their spouses or those whom their right hands possess, for (with regard to them) they are without blame. But those who crave something beyond that are transgressors.”(Al-Mu'minoon:5-7) Imam Malik argued that the masturbator is one of those who ‘crave something beyond that.’ On the other hand, it is reported that Imam Ahmad Ibn Hanbal regarded semen as an excretion of the body like other excrete, and permitted its expulsion the same way blood letting is permitted. Ibn Hazm holds the same view. However, the Hanbali jurists permit masturbation only under two conditions: first, the fear of committing fornication or adultery, and second, not having the means to marry. We are inclined to accept the opinion of Imam Ahmad in a situation in which there is sexual excitation and danger of committing the Haram. For example, a young man has gone abroad to study or work, thereby encountering many temptations which he fears he will be unable to resist, may resort to this method of relieving sexual tension provided he does not do it excessively or make it a habit.

Yet, better than this is the Prophet's advice to the Muslim youth who is unable to marry, namely, that he seek help through frequent fasting, for fasting nurtures will-power, teaches control of desires, and strengthens the fear of Allah. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, is reported to have said, “O youth, whoever of you is able to marry, let him marry, for it spares one looking at what one should not, or lapsing in adultery. And if he cannot marry, let him observe fasting, for it is a shield against evil."' (Reported by Muslim.)

If you are unable to marry, or if there is a dire necessity to be away from your partner, then you should make use of the following:

1.    Observing fasting, because it bolsters one's faith, preserves chastity, and protects one from evil thoughts.

2.    Observing moderation in eating and drinking in order to avoid stimulating your desire.

3.    Keeping away from anything that is sexually stimulating, such as pornographic pictures, erotic films and love songs.

4.    Choosing good and righteous friends.

5.    Keeping yourself busy in worship and spiritual acts.

6.    Interacting with activities of the society in such away that it keeps you away from thinking about sex.

7.    Avoiding gatherings and places that bring men and women physically close to each other.

8.    Avoiding sleeping on beds that are so soft that they make one think about sex.

9.    Trying to admire natural things such as flowers and beautiful scenery, which do not stimulate one sexually, instead of admiring members of the opposite sex.

If you find the previous things useful, then it is forbidden for you to masturbate. However, if you find that you cannot relieve yourself except through masturbation, and you fear you may lapse in adultery if you do not masturbate, then the juristic rule which states that the lesser evil is to be suffered in order to fend off the major one applies to you, as masturbation is deemed to be the lesser of two evils in this case. But, we would like to stress that this may be done only in the case of dire necessity, when all solutions prove to be of no avail.

To begin with, you have to realize that you can in fact help yourself abstain from masturbating. If you are really serious about quitting, then there are some steps you can take. Think about what arouses you or leads you to masturbation. Are there external stimuli such as through the internet, television, movies, or print media? If so, the most obvious step to take is to completely get restrain from exposure to such stimuli. Even if shaitan should tempt you to look at such material, resist and seek refuge in Allah from shaitan. Remind yourself how you feel immediately after you masturbate. Think about the feelings of shame and guilt that you experience. Do not make light of these feelings because over time, not processing these feelings will cause them to accumulate and cause you both emotional and psychological pain.

Finally, make lots of du’a to Allah Most High and seek His guidance in overcoming this habit. You should repent to Allah for any sins you might have committed. Allah is Oft-forgiving, Merciful and ensha’Allah you will be able to overcome this habit with His help. And Allah knows best. [Source]

I am a 21 year-old man and I’ve been playing with myself for over five years. I am tired now of the very clear effects on me - physically and psychologically. It has impeded me from growing intellectually and I have lost confidence in myself. I have failed to quit it so many times; but now I am trying to know that it is not going to last for ever. I have become a sex addict, and because of this, I am not planning to get married until I graduate from college.I do not need fatwa because I already know that what I am doing is wrong. I am seeking a practical solution for my suffering. By the way, I am not good at exposing my secrets to anybody, which is why I am using Cyber Counseling.

As-salaamu Alaykum brother and May Allah s.w.t guide you to your inner strength to overcome your current difficulties.

Al-hamdu-Lillah that you have recognized the effects of masturbation on you – physically –and you are able to focus your attention on more positive aspects of your life. You have referred to several elements all connected to one’s ‘will’:-

Tiredness
Loss of confidence
Failure to quit
Sex addiction

When one ‘overrides’ one’s will, and gives into any form of addiction (emotional, psychological, or otherwise), one eliminates the ability to choose. One disempowers oneself and becomes a slave to the addiction. All the symptoms that you have described are a reflection of this. Even when you become tired of the repetition of it all – when it no longer holds the initial excitement for you – your ability to stop is weak and the addiction becomes more entrenched.

You are sharing a natural God-given part of yourself with yourself, when it should be with your marriage partner. It is a bit like an air-conditioner in an enclosed room. It just recycles stale air, while the occupants within the room become more lethargic or irritable. The sexual energy is also an important part of your ‘will’ ,which is decreasing in its strength.

Try and take a look at the times when the need arises. What are you actually feeling about yourself a few minutes before the need arises? Do you feel frustrated about any aspect of your life whereby you feel unable to express your personality, your opinions, or even your ideas? Do you think there is a possibility that masturbation is just a mechanism to release that pent-up feeling? What I am trying to say is, you need to look at the cause, for the solution is in the reason. Sometimes we can misdirect our energies and end up seeking relief from that inner tension in the most inappropriate ways.

Keep some form of diary to note the circumstances around the times you do masturbate, because sometimes we are unaware of why we do certain things. Are there things in your environment that have an influence in this direction – popular songs, TV, cinema, or certain types of people? If so, as much as you can, avoid them. The TV is the easiest. If you watch a lot of TV, and you feel that it is too much to eliminate it altogether, try and only switch it on when there are specific programs that you wish to watch. Make yourself busy during the commercials and return to the TV when the programme has resumed.

The ‘will’ is very much related to the lower spine and the vocal chords in terms of your direction of energy. For your spine, it would be more than worth your while to seek physical activities that would release and utilize this energy. Swimming is a good exercise for the whole of the spine, and although after a lengthy swim you might feel tired, you will also feel refreshed. Football, tennis or just going for a run are good activities for releasing any pent-up emotions.

In terms of your vocal chords, singing offers an opportunity to release any tensions in the throat and assists with the inner feeling of being able to express oneself. It does not matter if you are not a great singer; what matters is the release of tension. If you really want to take this further, and hate the idea of singing, why not take up on perfect recitation of the Qur’an in tajwid. This method of reading the Qur’an has tremendous benefits for you as the reciter. It will also help to make you realize who you are and what you real needs are. If you can combine the physical and the vocal activities, gradually your tiredness will go away and your sense of purpose to life will take on greater shape.

Better still, what hobbies do you do? Have you forgotten about them? If so, why? Think about starting one of your hobbies again or start a new hobby, especially if it is creative. Your sense of achievement, confidence, and therefore, the ability to exert control over your will-power will become active again.

Any form of energy does not respond well to being bottled-up. This is one of the reasons why marriage is important in Islam. In a healthy marriage we can often express ourselves in more constructive and creative ways. As you so rightly mentioned, the idea of marriage is not possible until after you have completed your studies. In the meantime, it is important that you find healthy ways of using up all this energy, so that you can lead a more healthy and balanced life – Jazak Allah Khayr. [Source]